It DOES Get Better

I have a lot of thoughts on the subject of gay suicide, but I want to be able to give it the attention it deserves. In the meantime, I AM wearing purple today (and pretty much everyday) in a show of support. If you are the victim of bullying, take it from me... They will get what's coming to them. Karma is a beautiful thing. Just be strong... Listen to your favorite album and imagine all the fabulous things you will accomplish.


Being young is one of the hardest things I have ever experienced, but I got through it. There is a much better world waiting for you just around the corner. Be brave, kids...

Negative Space

Had yet another oral surgery today.... Fun with a capital F! Drove myself home wondering if, indeed, this is real life? But you know, I never wanted to be your weekend lover. Also, I think it's high time we all delete Sally Field from our friends list because... No, we don't really like you, Gidget.

In the absence of loftier goals, I've been communing with negative space. I fill it with positive energy and watch the elementary fireworks until I finally give in to the moment just after it's passed. Think, think, think... What would Zizek do? Or Kant? Or Jeremy Bieber?

Yes, you read that right: Jeremy Bieber, father of Justin. That's a father worth googling, if googling fathers is indeed your bag. It's only occasionally MY bag, depending of course on whether or not it goes with my ensemble for the day. Mother wanted me to come out in a kimono. We had a horrible fight....

A bit of paranoia struck me earlier, regarding bed bugs and the state of my couch. Though it was well into the evening's television programming, I busted out the steamer and gave the entire living furniture the once over. I'm not really sure if steam adversely affects bed bugs, but it did make me feel better. Plus, adding a couple of drop of lavender essential oil into the machine makes it all smell spring time fresh!

I start back to work tomorrow after an all too brief hiatus that was more drama filled than an episode of Desperate Housewives. We've had guests, honey. It hasn't been pretty. I'm wondering why I feel the need to smudge this entire apartment with sage??

Give us this day our daily check, please!

Highly Domestic

A little late for spring cleaning, but still I am compelled to dust off the evil of neglect and start anew. Housekeeping is such a temporary satisfaction. It seems that no sooner have I cleared the clutter and it has begun all over again. As usual, I wonder what it is I am avoiding by playing housewife to myself. Surely there are some incredibly manly things that I can't bear to begin. And so it is that I find myself blogging this sunny California afternoon.

My teeth feel tight.

I've been eating sugar and far too much sugar lately. Trying, unsuccessfully to satiate this longing.... I was entirely unprepared for the fact that the HOLIDAYS are upon us. It still feel like summer to me. But, I can't argue with the Halloween displays at the local drugstore, or the Thanksgiving and Christmas decorations starting to fill the local stores.... Didn't we just do this? I'm not ready for another year. I want to take this holiday off.... I dread the food. The shopping... The traffic, the traveling... The family and predictability of it all.

On the other hand, I really don't know what else I would rather be doing.

I've eaten all the macaroons I've been given.

It's Like a Dog, It Will Bite You...

I return to the keyboard, mouse and publish button. It's not that I didn't have fun with my other mistresses, canvases, paints and guitars... Just that I hate the Dilettante card. Hate, hate, hate it.... No, I would much rather be an Artist. True Artist. Favorite Artist. Anything but an amateur.

I cut my own hair last night. Chopped at it viciously with a scissor until I could regain my composure enough to stop. It looks okay. Would probably be a better look if this was 1963. No, you can't see a picture. I will have to turn in my hipster union card, though. I'm totally uncool right now. Maybe that admission makes me cool again. But I have a slight headache, oatmeal to eat and a body to punish at the gym.

I hope that we can be friends again. All my imaginary ones have long since left the building... Come back to the five and dime with me?